The on-going list of Unspoken Rules of Motherhood pertaining to the School. These are things I have learned, noticed or have been told. Some are serious, some are just for fun – you be the judge! Check back regularly to see what I’ve added.
#1: Thou shall show up on time: Don’t be that parent who is ALWAYS late. Your kid hates walking in late and the teacher doesn’t like having to change the attendance.
#2: Thou shall be clothed: Don’t get out of your vehicle in the school drop off if you’re in your pajamas. Especially if you’re the type that care about what others think. But even if you don’t, your kid probably does and you don’t need to embarrass them.
#3: Thou shall not park in the line up: Our school doesn’t exactly have a drop off line up but there’s a lot of parents who pull up, let their kids out then head out on their way. Don’t be the parent that screws it all up by PARKING in this spot and getting out of your vehicle. It runs smoothly when you’re not parked there Susan!
#4: Thou shall volunteer: Whether it’s making copies of newsletters, handing out pizza, or running a program, just do it. Your kid will love having you around the school and the school will love having your help.
#5: If you can’t volunteer then Thou shall help: Chaperone a dance, show up to a Parent Council meeting to give input, send money, do SOMETHING to help.
#6: Thou shall not give opinion if Thou cannot be bothered: If you can’t be bothered to volunteer or help in any way, keep your opinions to yourself about how fundraisers and meal programs are run. Don’t complain if you won’t be part of the solution.
#7: Thou shall give gifts: At the end of the year teachers deserve SOMETHING. Make them a card, buy them an LCBO gift card, buy them a coffee, just do SOMETHING. Those people look after your “angel” five days per week all school year, they know what kind of trouble your kid is and they’ve gotten to know your family. Give them something. Even if it’s hush money so they don’t tell next year’s teacher how horrible Junior is.
#8: Thou shall know everyone’s business, but never tell your own: you want to know who all the parents are so you can connect your child’s friends to adult faces and you want the other parents to know who you are. You also want to know what kind of people they are because let’s face it, all parents are like that, but you never want to air your dirty laundry on the schoolyard.
#9: Thou shall gift LCBO cards: your child’s teacher has become part of your life for the entire school year. They know that junior is not the perfect child you crack them up to be. Pay for them to have a good drink!
#10: Thou shall always smile: when you’re at the school for drop-off, pick-up or volunteering, SMILE! The other parents will want to get to know you (remember #8) and the students won’t think you’re a troll – believe me, you don’t want them to think you’re a troll.
#11: Thou shall keep sick children home: junior most likely got sick at school because another parent didn’t keep their sick child at home. Don’t be THAT parent. Nobody likes that parent.
#12: Thou shall immunize: I know, touchy subject and I’ll probably get some flack for it but I strongly believe in it for good reason. There are children in my kids’ school that have different immune systems. I say different for lack of a better word coming to mind. These children can’t get fully immunized against horrible diseases for health reasons such as cancer or other illnesses. So when Junior who has not received the immunization for “belief purposes” contracts measles and then goes to school (remember #11), Missy who has cancer could potentially die due to contracting said measles from Junior. “But Junior washes his hands and covers his mouth when he coughs,” big whoop. Have you ever been inside a school? Those students are germ breeding grounds. Just get the shots, if for no other reason than to potentially save a child’s life (other than your own).
#13: Thou shall keep lice at home: SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!!! Schools can no longer legally ban children from coming to school when they have lice (not here anyway). And there is now also a strand of “Super Lice” that is immune to almost EVERYTHING. No, I don’t have the facts BUT I have had the experience. I did everything: washing, drying for hours, garbage bags, throwing out, over the counter meds….I was ready to burn my entire home to the ground. I finally got rid of it out of my daughter’s hair when I dyed it, cut it all off (into a cute pixie cut) and spent HUNDREDS of dollars rebuying everything for her. Just keep your hair bugs at your house until they’re all dead – FOR SURE.