The on-going list of Unspoken Rules of Motherhood pertaining to The Parenting. These are things I have learned, noticed or have been told. Some are serious, some are just for fun – you be the judge! Check back regularly to see what I’ve added.
#1: Thou shall not judge other parents. Everyone parents differently, no one knows what’s going on, and every child is different. Just do you and don’t worry about Susan.
#2: Thou shall purchase what they can afford. Don’t worry about brands and what’s “in”. If you’re comfortable in it, your children are clothed, your home is (somewhat) clean, then who cares?! I know kids like to have the “nice” clothes, but buying second hand never hurt anyone!
#3: Thou shall learn how to use a hair trimmer. If you have boys, learn how to use a trimmer (buzzer, whatever you call it). You will save TONS of money and your son will get to proudly sport a decent “my mom cut my hair” look.
#4: Thou shall allow thy kids to start a business. Lemonade stand, babysitting, direct sales….it’s all a great opportunity and has TONS of learning involved! Like real world, real life learning opportunities! Not to mention, your kid can now go buy THEMSELVES that little toy that they really don’t need – not YOU!
#5: Thou shall put thy kids in extracurriculars. Sports, art, clubs, church, whatever your kid is into I’m sure your town (or one close by) has a group for it! Extracurriculars are not meant to be a babysitter, they are meant to give your child new opportunities, new skills, or even just new social time. I’m not saying they should be in something every single day after school and every weekend, just once a week is great!
#6: Thou shall understand there will never be enough coffee – or wine. Parenting is HARD. And the older they get, the harder it gets. We are all in this ride together and sometimes the coffee or wine just doesn’t do it. Have a good cry momma, and then handle it.
#7: Thou shall know you are not alone – in anything. We are all going through this mom thing. Sure, everyone’s perspective and experience is different, but you’re never alone. If you ever feel the need to talk then DO IT! Talk to your best friend, your mom, your grandma, your doctor, your therapist, the other mom at the park, your pastor….if you’re really stuck and need some anonymous help? Find an online parenting group, message an admin and ask them to post anonymously for you – then let it fly!
#8: Thou shall know you are not the only one losing your shit. Seriously, you aren’t. Every mom has days here and there that they are just DONE. With it all. And every one. Don’t ever feel guilty or ashamed of losing your shit once in a while. Now, if you’re doing it every day you may want to seek help – but that’s also none of my business 😉
#9: Thou shall find thy’s tribe. Every mom needs at least a few close friends that she can chat with, vent to, let go of life for just a few minutes with, or even have a couple drinks once in a while! If you don’t already have a tribe, put yourself out there and find one. If you do…..have you hung out lately?
#10: Thou shall inform thy kids. Bullying, adolescence, periods, sex, alcohol, drugs….they learn about things in school from health class and friends. But be the mom that sits down and has that awkward talk about it all. Maybe don’t lay it on them all at once but seriously do it. So many kids are ill-informed or still have questions that the teachers aren’t aloud to answer!
#11: Thou shall tell thy kids to talk. Make sure your kids know they can come to you when they need to. Be the open parent, the one they feel comfortable with asking questions and telling about their troubles. Believe me, you need it just as bad as they do.
#12: Thou shall not compare thy kids. It’s human nature to compare to others. But please realize your child is completely different from another child. And if you have more than one child you’ve probably already figured this out! Their kid is talking by age 2? That’s great, yours will get there. Their kid made lead role in the high school musical? Congratulations, yours will do amazing things too. Theirs got straight A’s this report? Amazing, maybe yours just needs a little extra help. NOTHING is worth comparing in the parenting game. NOTHING!